Minta Tidur Tenang. Moga Hati Datang.

Satay the rabbit used to be scared of sitting at the garage. He almost became rabbit pancake once. Since then, he never did. But he does now. Sits near the gate, ears all up, twitching at every sound -and waits. We think he's waiting for Grey. Now that he has known what it's like to have a companion, he's lonely without.

Lack of sleep makes you go crazy. You cannot imagine what lack of sleep and endless thinking since 2am does to you. Insane doesn't even begin to describe it.

Wounds do not heal easily. Not when you're crazy.

We both wish we have enough courage to talk to him. So that the repetition will just stop. That please, have faith. Our mistakes will not bring us down to an extent we stop living.

We were the oddest three. Twice covered by darkness, literally (though I must admit, it was ironic. Since metaphorically it makes sense as well). We were the oddest three, and found ourselves talking about the most random things. Oddly laughing together. Odd.

The number started out as 5. Before all hell broke loose. And he was the strongest one that stood up against me. A phone call with a slight warning and since then never again, not even for tea. Please, not even an honest smile since then. Until we were both needed to listen to the little sister we both care deeply about. I am part of a picture he acknowledges now, literally. And I am touched. And honored.

Now I know they've missed me too.

I do not have the strength to go hill climbing. But I must. Yes, must. I am reconnecting, thus plans for the comfort of two years ago. Because I have been waay out of touch, and I cannot lose my 5th Horcrux. Because I will go crazy if I lose anymore. Because it is hell tiring to lose and lose again. Because I know what I need and at times I go insane or routine-ish, I know what I need. Thus Horcruxes, and yesterday, I realized my 5th amidst rocks and harnesses.

I will pray for peace of Heart -especially in things I cannot come to terms with yet. I will pray hard for peace of Heart. Among other things. And for the price of rabbits to go down so that we can buy Satay a companion.

I will pray for peace of Heart.